Day 15, 16, 17: Acceptance

musicSome days just start off not working out as planned.  Other times the day seem to fall into place like a well played symphony.  A symphony is the perfect synonym to describe living in acceptance.

Acceptance is getting lost within the flow of chaos and feeling the beauty of the moment.  It is seeing how all the pieces fit together perfectly in order to create a rhythmic pattern of balance.

Acceptance is not the turning of the tide.  It is not the point at which things shift into the direction of our liking.  It is when our own personal plans are set aside and we see the situation as something greater than our role within it.  Further still, cialis sales pilule our view point is expanded and we find peace within the chaos.

I always thought of acceptance as learning to tolerate something I did not like.  When someone would say to me you have to accept this in your life I would respond like a caged animal.  In my mind acceptance was the same as admitting defeat.  Acceptance was somehow saying I deserved whatever real or imaged thing I felt was blocking my desired progression.

Conversations with those I felt had power over me come to mind:  “We are moving, you’re our child, so you better learn to accept it.”  “Your child has died, you simply must accept it.” “You will never escape, just accept it.”  “You have to accept it you may never get better.”

Coming to terms with something that seems unbearable is not the same as being in acceptance.  Coming to terms with something is setting it aside in your heart but allowing it to hold a place of honor.  You can take it out and look at it.  It can be used to show your scars to the world or to abuse yourself with the fear of being out of control.   Coming to terms with something allows us an excuse to stay stuck or to throw ourselves back into a moment of pain or horror that we feel no one should ever have to endure.    It can easily become our badge, our war story, and our life long anchor.

Acceptance is finding beauty in all of it.  It is reading the whole book and wanting more. It is knowing sorrow is felt so deeply because love is felt so completely.  It is an uprooted life remembered as adventures and new people, places and things discovered.  It is knowing the pain endured while being trapped helped develop skills of determination and strength.  It is seeing  years of life thought  wasted on despair and anger as rest in preparation for a life yet lived.

Life most often does not bend to our will.  We learn to fight the tide, we learn to ride the waves.  At times it feels as if we will surely die from the pain which is piled on our hearts.  At other times we think we will explode with the abundance of joy and love in our lives.  It is explosive, chaotic, tranquil and exhilarating.  The best we can do is play on and accept we are a part of the orchestra.

Acceptance is not coming to terms with life as it is or may have been.  Acceptance is the awareness that we are playing our own instruments in this life.  We must learn the skills necessary in order to play in harmony within this world.  At times we play solo sounding flat and off key.  Others times the music breathes through us as an expansion of our soul.

 

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